CONFLICTS TEACHES YOU POWERFUL LESSONS AND MAKE YOU A BETTER HUMAN BEING!!

We all run away from conflicts. It really makes us feel bad, so we avoid it. We all hope it will somehow resolve itself. But it never does! Instead it just festers like a bad wound- what we resist really does persist.

I have a different point of view on conflict. Conflict is an opportunity for greater growth and deeper personal connection. Every conflict carries within it a powerful lessons to make you a better human being in your understanding and perspective. I have seen that every conflict whether with a loved one or anybody else, is a gorgeous opportunity to forge an even  closer bond with them. It turns their dissatisfaction into a wow for both of you.

So don’t run away from conflict. Avoid sending email when you know you need to speak  some truth face to face. Its all about balancing compassion with courage. And let me tell you it can feel so messy,in truth its a gift. Accept and embrace it. Relish the potential it carries. Celebrate it!!

IT CAN SERVE YOU SO WELL!!

________________

Advertisements

IS IT RIGHT TO LIVE IN A WORLD OF LIKE MINDED PEOPLE??

If your reply is ‘YES’,think again and if ‘NO’-stop condemning others!!

We all have vice of complaining.you can easily fall into the habit of condemning others,even those we love most.we have tendency to criticize the way someone eats or the manner in which others speak and walk.we focus on the most minute details and find fault with small issues.This is a reality we cannot deny.But please remember,what we focus on grows.And if we keep focusing on a small weakness in someone,it will continue to grow in our mind until we perceive it to be a big problem in that person.

I have now a question to you! Do you really want to live in a world of like minded people where everyone looked,acted and thought exactly as you do?In my view it could be a very boring place.It would  be right to say that richness of our society comes from its diversity.What can make relationship,community and countries memorable are not the things that we have in common but the differences and diverse cultures that can make this world unique.India is a live example of this.we should begin to respect differences and diversity rather looking for things to criticize in those around you.

We often perceive in others the weakness we most need to address within ourselves.So,please avoid blaming and condemning.Accept full responsibility for the way things are and resolve to work on changing yourself before seeking to change others.This could be a clear sign of a person of strong character.

                                                                  MESSAGE

Remember Erica jong’s saying,”Take your life into your own hands and what happens?

A terrible thing: no one to blame”.

                                                                   ____________

 

A SMALL SERVICE TO MY BELOVED READERS:

As i am also a life coach, if you so desire, you can refer to me  your personal, professional and family issues either through my blog or my email (given below) and I would send you my advice within a week.I am extending my services  to you for a very nominal  fee of 1 $ per advice which I only want to charge because when you get something free, you do not value it.My main objective

is to give you the benefit of my knowledge and three decades experience  so that you begin to think and understand life issues in an appropriate and rational manner and right perspective and lead a calm,anxiety free and happy life.

My email: ravi_singh52@hotmail.com

Thanks and Regards.

IS YOUR SEX LIFE  LOSING SPARK  A SEX DETOX CAN REIGNITE THIS SPARK AGAIN!!

“A MAN NEEDS SEX TO GET INTIMATE,WHILE A WOMAN NEEDS

TO GET INTIMATE TO HAVE SEX.”

 

A detox in the area of sex means eliminating sexual performance entirely,thereby making sex come across as the forbidden fruit.This increases longing for each other and helps reignite the passion.

Over a period  of time,say a few years down the line,couples tend to lose the spark,especially between the sheets.The reason for this lack of interest could be plenty-a busy schedule,work-related stress and/or tiredness,the same bedroom and the same positions.Your sex life is dramatically affected by these factors.After a long day work,you naturally want space to relax.This could lead to physical and emotional distance and THAT IS EXACTLY WHEN A SEX DETOX COMES INTO PLAY!!

“Sexual motivation is influenced by various hormones.When you abstain from sex,you become increasingly aware of the absence of hormonal release.This craving boosts your libodo and sexual performance.Now you may be having frequent sex or you may not have had sex with your partner for a while,BUT,that hunger that arises when you are aware that you are off sex for a month is what reignite passion.

Sex detox will help you to achieve the relationship results you both deserve.when you are on sex detox,you better rethink what both of you need and arrive at a decision with consideration for each other’s feelings,For instance,you cannot have sex but you can still cuddle,spoon and enjoy intimacy.Or if one of the partner feels ‘denied’ or rejected sexually during detox,this should be discussed openly and without resentment.

It should take only about a month of abstinence to notice the desired benefits-men begin to experience better erection and women enjoy sustained arousal and stronger orgasms.That slight hint of desperation add spice to your love life.IT IS LIKE YOUR FIRST TIME ALL OVER AGAIN!!

                                                                         MESSAGE

A HEALTHY SEX LIFE IS IMPORTANT FOR BOTH OF YOU.PLEASE DO NOT TAKE THINGS FOR GRANTED.YOU BOTH MAY HAVE TO CONSISTENTLY INVEST TIME AND ENERGY AND FIND CREATIVE MEANS LIKE ‘Sex Detox’ TO KEEP YOUR SEX LIFE HAPPY AND SPICY.

IS IT DESIRABLE?

 HOW TO HANDLE YOUR SHORT-TEMPERED SPOUSE!!

 

     Most marriages go through periods of highs and lows-It is normal!! Therefore,it is quite common for a husband and wife to differ on certain points.At times,one-person becomes more dominant than the other.If the husband enjoys making his point heard, wife may prefer to let him have his say to maintain calmness and peace in their relationship.

Likewise, wife may disagree with her husband on different matters and the husband may choose to act as a peacemaker in the house.I have even seen short tempered wives and husbands,sometimes,do not even hesitate to scream at each other or at their sweet kids-not only in the house but also at the public places.Most of the time,the main reason of their scream is their stress and anxiety(due to any reason).

Believe me,these are the facts of life and you may have to face it at some point of life.

SOME EFFECTIVE WAY’S TO HANDLE YOUR SPOUSE’S BAD TEMPER:

1-Recognize the triggers,the first step is to recognize each other’s temperament.Make it a point to communicate and voice your feeling to one another in a calm and best possible way without being judgemental .For your respective anger issues,you can deal with them more effectively.It is a common knowledge that ‘opposite attract’ and so make sure that both of you balance each other out and are aware of what irks the other.

2-Learn to take one step back.It would be a wise move if you take a step back to allow your partner to cool down.Therefore,if you find your spouse getting angry over something,please do not make things ugly or worse by tackling them or reprimanding them for their actions then and there.Instead,step aside and allow them to calm down.In time,they themselves will come back and apologize for their outburst.The key here is to give them their space,so that they get time to realize their fault on their own.

3-Keep you attitude in check.Realize that,at times,it may be your behavior,body language and attitude that may cause tempers to fly.But if you fight fire with fire,you will surely land up in a stalemate with the problem still left unresolved.It is important that you manage your emotions well in order to prevent any major outburst with your temperamental spouse.So,if you know that there are things that could cause emotional outburst,your reaction to it could determine whether it has the possibility of turning ugly or getting unresolved.

4 – Have patience, patience and patience.

In order to really deal with your short-tempered spouse,you will have to demonstrate a lot of patience.Sometimes,you may disapprove of your own spouse’s outburst or screaming over trivial and petty issues.These may cause you to wonder what you might have done wrong.However,the key to dealing with such outburst over minor issues is to have the patience to deal with your partner calmly.

Therefore,please avoid  responding with equally nasty or provocative comments that could rupture into something major incident.

5-Talk,talk and talk. Encourage them towards change.you could help encourage your spouse to adopt certain tips to calm down during an outburst. Deep breathing,yoga and meditation could prove to be the right solution to help your partner to keep his/her stress and anxiety under control,which in turn will keep his/her temper under check.

I HAVE BEEN DOING IT FOR LAST THREE DECADES AND TRUST ME-IT HELPS A LOT TO KEEP YOUR STRESS,ANXIETY AND TEMPER UNDER FULL CONTROL.

TRY IT !!

6-Last but very important.A better sex life.This could be a major reason,why a spouse has a bad temper.It is vital that you both have a healthy sex life.If there are any issues,it must be resolved as fast as possible.

A GOOD SEX LIFE KEEPS A SPOUSE STRESS FREE,HAPPY AND TEMPER FREE.

YES,THIS IS TRUE!!

Based on my knowledge and experience about human behavior,I am confident that these tips will definitely help you to handle your spouse’s anger effectively

HOWEVER, SHOULD NONE OF THESE TIPS WORK,JUST REMEMBER THAT YOU HAVE PICKED UP HER/HIM AND THEREFORE TAKE LIFE AS IT COMES TO YOU.EVERYTHING CHANGES ONE DAY(LAW OF NATURE) AND SO WILL CHANGE YOUR SPOUSE’S BAD TEMPER ALSO-ONE DAY.

                                                         MY MESSAGE

WAIT FOR THAT DAY-IT WILL SURELY COME.

IS IT A PROFESSIONAL BEHAVIOR?

Managers should strive to be role models, setting an example of a mature professional behavior. Unfortunately. however, some managers exactly do the opposite. These immature individuals refuse to control their emotions and freely vent their frustrations by yelling at employees. Amazingly, their own bosses seldom see this childish behavior. If you are stuck with one of these stress-inducing Managers, you may follow these coping suggestions.

1. Accept the fact that you have an immature manager. Lower your expectations. This boss is never going to be wise, mature mentors of your dreams. So just expect him to act like a tantrum-throwing two-year-old boy.If you develop this mindset,you will not be disappointed.

2. Don’t take it personally, Bad tempered bosses yell at everyone except people who have more power. So, remember that this has nothing to do with you personally.

3. Don’t respond in kind- yelling back at your bad-tempered boss will only escalate this situation, and since this person has some power over you, that could affect your career adversely. This may not be fair but it is a fact.

4. Remember that one of you needs to act like an adult. That must be you. If two people act like children, the result is a playground fight. Since your manager is already acting like a kid, you are the only one left who can keep the situation under control.

5. Wait until the dust settles down: If you don’t feed the fire, the managerial temper tantrum will gradually recede. You cant have a rational conversation with an angry person. So, keep your responses neutral and minimal until she/he burns herself/ himself out.

6. But- if your boss crosses the line and becomes abusive, talk to HR head or Higher management.

7. A HOTHEAD MANAGER IS ONE THING, BUT AN ABUSIVE BOSS IS ANOTHER. If your manager’s behavior is extreme or causes ongoing emotional stress, you need to talk with someone. Companies should not tolerate such managers. So, someone in HR or upper management must know this.

8. AND IF THE SITUATION STILL DOES NOT IMPROVE, GET OUT OF THERE, Perhaps, you can learn to cope with the situation. Or perhaps you can change it. But, if neither seems possible, YOU NEED TO FIND A MORE PROFESSIONAL PLACE TO WORK.

Abusive managers can be damaging to your mental and physical health, and no job is worth that.

YES- THAT’S IT!!

HOW TO COMBINE CREATIVITY AND RESULTS!!

As a rule, critical thinking is the norm in academia, and asking questions is necessary. Questioning ideas is the first step, and second is questioning the question itself.

As a result, academia has a reputation for being too open- ended and sluggish. In industry, we prefer to set a deadline, get things done and most importantly focus on execution. We worry that thinking about an idea could hold up progress.

Combine the two approaches to be sure you are both thinking creatively and getting results as well. Ask lots of questions but don’t let the questions impede  movement.

The questions should drive you toward a clear, defensible outcome!!

_______________

KARMVEER!! (ACTION WARRIOR)

I wrote this poem last night and is dedicated to all my  beloved fans of wordpress.

 

Ho sakta hai ki tum mujhe,

Hazaar baar zameen par gira do,

Lekin ye tay hai ki tum mujhe,

zameen par uthne se nahi roke paoge!!

Ho sakta hai tum mujhe ghayal karke,

phir girane mei kaamyaab ho jao,

Lekin ye mera drihd neeschaya hai ki,

Tum mujhe khade hokar aage badhne se nahi roke paoge!!

KYON KI JEEVAN HAR HAAL MEI CHALNE KA NAAM HAI!!

Message

Karmveer Bano

English Translation for those fans who cannot understand Hindi:

It is possible that you may knock me down 1000 times,

But one thing is for sure- I will again get up!

It is likely that you may make me fall down again,

But I will be determined to get up again and march ahead,

And you dare not stop me,

Because to keep moving ahead is what  keeps me alive and Karmveer( Action warrior) is my name.

Pl do send me your feedback.

_____________