DO YOU WANT TO HAVE A BETTER SELF CONTROL AND WILLPOWER?? TRY THIS!!

Silence and smile are two powerful tools.

Smile is the way to solve many problems and

Silence is the way to avoid many problems!!

 

Your silence for one hour a day can bring magical results!!

Yes, silence can build up an enormous willpower-one that has been used by the Buddhist monks and many cultures over the years to build up a rock like willpower and enormous amount of inner strength and determination.you can enhance your will power and self control by observing silence even for a short period because you exert force on your will by not giving in to the impulse to talk.

I see many people talking far more than they need to.we often continue to talk on and on rather than speaking precisely and communicating only what needs to be communicated.It only reflects a lack of discipline in our life.Discipline involves saying exactly what needs to be said and preserving your precious mental energy by not talking more than you have to.Measured,precise speech is also a sign of clear thought and of a serene mind.

A better strategy to improve your personal discipline could be to take a firm decision to be silent for one hour a day over the next seven days.you must not speak at all during this silent time.DON’T WASTE YOUR WORDS ON PEOPLE WHO DESERVE YOUR SILENCE.However,if you must,speak only in a direct response to a question and give a brief,clear and crisp answer without getting into a detailed conversation.you can observe silence politely and warmly.The purpose of this exercise is to make you stronger and  build up your WILL.

Believe me,in a few days,you will feel and experience a tremendous sense of CONTROL and POWER growing within you.The results will speak for themselves.

                                                                _____________

A SMALL SERVICE TO MY BELOVED READERS:

As i am also a life coach, if you so desire, you can refer to me  your personal, professional and family issues either through my blog or my email (given below) and I would send you my advice within a week.I am extending my services  to you for a very nominal  fee of 1 $ per advice which I only want to charge because when you get something free, you do not value it.My main objective

is to give you the benefit of my knowledge and three decades experience  so that you begin to think and understand life issues in an appropriate and rational manner and right perspective and lead a calm,anxiety free and happy life.

My email: ravi_singh52@hotmail.com

Thanks and Regards.

 

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YOU ARE BORN FOR A REASON-BIG OR SMALL!!

We start to live our lives from the day we start to take our very first  breath that god has given to us.Our purpose starts to take shape.With that first breath,we also step in the world which has endless failure for people who give up and astounding success for individuals who never give up trying.Money,fame ,success…all this has no meaning if the person has not worked harder and harder each day in order to achieve it.

We often hear…”HARDWORK IS THE KEY TO SUCCESS”;for achieving anything, hardwork is must.Work is a great rescue for all difficulties.Constant vigilance and dedication towards work is the price that we pay to gain success in life.Without hardwork, one cannot achieve,but can only dream and desire of achieving it.People go through certain phases in life….good and tough times.We are all humans,we all have that capability to make life as it existed in our dreams.When our time to experience that ‘dream’finally arrives,we forget almost everything and we ultimately get lost in that success,that success which we have been desperately wanting since forever.But somehow,when we actually start to live that dream,we forget about how to make it last forever.In that particular time we only think of our present and not future and hence we face hardship in our future.

The longest journey that we as human being will ever go through is the journey of life.Life has its ups and downs and at the most unexpected time,can go into a horrifying downfall,which has rough and bumpy corners.We eventually ask ourselves,”do we have any control on what our future holds or which turn we will take?

It is  true that life cannot be perfect all the time.Once in a life time,every person faces ups and downs in their lives.It is also  true that an individual with his strength to hold on and with the power of determination can conquer any battle,even if it is the “BATTLE OF LIFE”.Man is born to to work,prosper and grow in life.Just like steel,he shines in use and rusts in rest.

How does it matter if a man lives for ninety years and it is all a story of idleness and wasted opportunities? Lord Jesus Christ died when he was hardly thirty,Lenin died before he was sixty,and yet they have impressions on human history.Idleness  is truly a curse.If we waste time,time shall waste us.A life crammed with work is a life bubbling with a joy of success.Great men of the world were born as unfortunates in cottages but they died in idols,in palaces.

To sum up,greatness and success lie in hard,honest and selfless work.life can be hard to understand and I don’t think even the person most in touch with themselves knows why they were put on  this earth.I believe that we were put on this earth for a reason,big or small.Do we have a plan of our life set out for us already,that we have to follow,no matter how much we try to change it!!

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Secret of maintaining a healthy Relationship.

  • HONESTY: This is the first &foremost quality you should have to maintain a Healthy Relationship. Be honest in everything you do.

 

  • GOOD HUMAN BEING: you can handle any or multiple complex Relationship provided you are a good human being.

 

  • About 99.9% Relationship fell apart because of communication problem they just don’t communicate with each other.Right communication does not mean what you ‘say’ to others but what is perceived by others.PLEASE ALWAYS COMMUNICATE effectively.

 

  • DEFEAT-There is no word like ‘DEFEAT’ in a Relationship.At times,you must learn to take one step back to maintain a harmonious Relationship.

 

  • IGNORE-Learn to ignore certain negative behavior in a person for a better relationship.

 

  • RESPECT-Always have respect for other’s views and feeling,be patient to listen to others.

 

  • COMMITMENT-Never back out from your commitment.

 

  • GIVE &TAKE: Never think what others have given to you.Think what you can give to others and make it a way of life.

 

  • Avoid ‘Fly by Night’ approach and maintain Relationship in ‘ Thick&Thin’ situation.Accept both good and bad in any relationship.

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IS IT DESIRABLE?

 HOW TO HANDLE YOUR SHORT-TEMPERED SPOUSE!!

 

     Most marriages go through periods of highs and lows-It is normal!! Therefore,it is quite common for a husband and wife to differ on certain points.At times,one-person becomes more dominant than the other.If the husband enjoys making his point heard, wife may prefer to let him have his say to maintain calmness and peace in their relationship.

Likewise, wife may disagree with her husband on different matters and the husband may choose to act as a peacemaker in the house.I have even seen short tempered wives and husbands,sometimes,do not even hesitate to scream at each other or at their sweet kids-not only in the house but also at the public places.Most of the time,the main reason of their scream is their stress and anxiety(due to any reason).

Believe me,these are the facts of life and you may have to face it at some point of life.

SOME EFFECTIVE WAY’S TO HANDLE YOUR SPOUSE’S BAD TEMPER:

1-Recognize the triggers,the first step is to recognize each other’s temperament.Make it a point to communicate and voice your feeling to one another in a calm and best possible way without being judgemental .For your respective anger issues,you can deal with them more effectively.It is a common knowledge that ‘opposite attract’ and so make sure that both of you balance each other out and are aware of what irks the other.

2-Learn to take one step back.It would be a wise move if you take a step back to allow your partner to cool down.Therefore,if you find your spouse getting angry over something,please do not make things ugly or worse by tackling them or reprimanding them for their actions then and there.Instead,step aside and allow them to calm down.In time,they themselves will come back and apologize for their outburst.The key here is to give them their space,so that they get time to realize their fault on their own.

3-Keep you attitude in check.Realize that,at times,it may be your behavior,body language and attitude that may cause tempers to fly.But if you fight fire with fire,you will surely land up in a stalemate with the problem still left unresolved.It is important that you manage your emotions well in order to prevent any major outburst with your temperamental spouse.So,if you know that there are things that could cause emotional outburst,your reaction to it could determine whether it has the possibility of turning ugly or getting unresolved.

4 – Have patience, patience and patience.

In order to really deal with your short-tempered spouse,you will have to demonstrate a lot of patience.Sometimes,you may disapprove of your own spouse’s outburst or screaming over trivial and petty issues.These may cause you to wonder what you might have done wrong.However,the key to dealing with such outburst over minor issues is to have the patience to deal with your partner calmly.

Therefore,please avoid  responding with equally nasty or provocative comments that could rupture into something major incident.

5-Talk,talk and talk. Encourage them towards change.you could help encourage your spouse to adopt certain tips to calm down during an outburst. Deep breathing,yoga and meditation could prove to be the right solution to help your partner to keep his/her stress and anxiety under control,which in turn will keep his/her temper under check.

I HAVE BEEN DOING IT FOR LAST THREE DECADES AND TRUST ME-IT HELPS A LOT TO KEEP YOUR STRESS,ANXIETY AND TEMPER UNDER FULL CONTROL.

TRY IT !!

6-Last but very important.A better sex life.This could be a major reason,why a spouse has a bad temper.It is vital that you both have a healthy sex life.If there are any issues,it must be resolved as fast as possible.

A GOOD SEX LIFE KEEPS A SPOUSE STRESS FREE,HAPPY AND TEMPER FREE.

YES,THIS IS TRUE!!

Based on my knowledge and experience about human behavior,I am confident that these tips will definitely help you to handle your spouse’s anger effectively

HOWEVER, SHOULD NONE OF THESE TIPS WORK,JUST REMEMBER THAT YOU HAVE PICKED UP HER/HIM AND THEREFORE TAKE LIFE AS IT COMES TO YOU.EVERYTHING CHANGES ONE DAY(LAW OF NATURE) AND SO WILL CHANGE YOUR SPOUSE’S BAD TEMPER ALSO-ONE DAY.

                                                         MY MESSAGE

WAIT FOR THAT DAY-IT WILL SURELY COME.

WHAT WOULD YOU HAVE DONE IN THIS SITUATION ?

WHILE ARROGANCE IS A SIGN OF YOUR WEAKNESS,

HUMILITY IS THE HIGHEST IMAGINABLE SIGN OF YOUR STRENGTH.

Taking one step back rather one step forward is not the sign of of your

weakness but it could be your victory and symbol of your MATURITY

and HUMILITY.

A truly humble man cannot be an arrogant person.One must reflect modesty like a tree that bends low with the burden of ripening fruits.

It is the barren tree that lifts itself high in an empty boast.Humility contrary to patriarchal designation of it as a sign of weakness,is in fact,the highest imaginable sign of strength.

One has to be spiritually and mentally balanced in an egoless state.This allows us to see order in chaos and chaos in order.In fact it is the balance WITHIN that permits us to see the balance in all things.Hence,chaos WITHOUT is a matter of perception,while chaos WITHIN is the conception of the ego.Be like the ocean which receives all streams and rivers.The ocean mighty calm remains unmoved;IT FEELS THEM NOT.

TO MAKE YOU UNDERSTAND BETTER ABOUT HUMILITY,I WILL TELL YOU A TRUE STORY OF TWO KINGS.

Once upon a time a king was passing through a dense forest in his royel Carrier alongwith a team of his trusted soldiers.His Carrier was passing through a very narrow passage.A second king of the neighbouring state also happened to be passing through the same forest and it was sheer coincidence that both the kings suddenly happen to meet head-on in that narrow passage.The horse carrier of both the kings had to stop because the passage at that point was so narrow that only one carriage could pass through.

The first king conveyed a message to the second king to take back his horse carrier by a few yards,so that he could pass through that narrow passage.The second king conveyed back the message to the first king that ‘I DON’T GIVE WAY TO FOOLS’ and he will not take back his horse carriage even by an inch.

The first king thought for a second and send across the message to the second king that read-‘I GIVE WAY TO FOOLS’ and he promptly instructed his men to take back the carrier by a few yards and gave way to the  second kind.

MORAL:TAKING ONE STEP BACK BY THE FIRST KING WAS IN NO WAY HIS WEAKNESS,BUT A SIGN OF MATURITY,HUMILITY AND VICTOR

 

                                                          MY MESSAGE

BE LIKE THAT TREE THAT BENDS LOW WITH THE BURDEN OF RIPENING FRUITS.GIVE UP YOUR ARROGANCE,BEND LOW AND DEMONSTRATE YOUR HUMILITY,WHEN THE NEED BE.

APPROACH OF THIS ‘EMPLOYED PROFESSIONAL’ MAY NOT GET HIM OUT OF HIS RUT!!

ALL EMPLOYED PROFESSIONALS!!-NO OFFENCE PLEASE!!

Doing Job is a model,our fathers followed and one day they taught us to follow this traditional model! Simple!! And we will possibly transfer it to our children and this vicious cycle will go on and on.Should this mindset not change with changing job culture?

WELL, IT IS FOR YOU TO TAKE THE FINAL CALL !!

I too have been an employed professional for more than two and half decades. Obviously, I too had the same approach and mindset back then. This subject is very close to my heart, so, I want to tell you a very important lesson.

WHAT YOU CONSTANTLY THINK ABOUT YOU IS WHAT YOU BECOME IN LIFE(LAW OF ATTRACTION)

To make you understand this subject better,I would tell you a story which is one of my all time favorite business stories:

It is about a 45 year old Manager always struggling to pay his bills.So,he decided to consult a financial expert and get some advice.The Manager makes an appointment to meet with a well reputed financial advisor,whose office was located  in an expensive and stylish building on Cannaught place,New Delhi.

The Manager enters the expert’s elegantly done reception room,but instead of a receptionist,the manager was greeted by two doors – one marked “employed” and the other “self employed”

He enters the door marked “employed” and is greeted by two more rooms – one marked “makes less than 10 lacs” and the other “makes more than 10 lacs”

He makes less than 10 lacs,so he enters the door,only to find himself face to face with two more doors.The door on the left is marked-“saves more than Rs 10,000 a year”,and the one on the right is marked-“saves less than Rs 10,000 a year”.

The Manager only has about Rs 3,000 in his bank account,so he enters the door on the right ONLY TO FIND HIMSELF ON THE CANNAUGHT PLACE ROAD.

MORAL:THE SAME DOOR LEAD TO THE SAME RESULTS:

It is painfully obvious that this Manager in the story will never get out of his RUT until he starts choosing to open different doors.The moral of the story is that most of the people are like the Manager,like me back then,-they choose to enters the doors of life that lead them right back to where they started.

The only way for people to get different results is to choose to enter the different doors-IS THAT NOT TRUE? LIKE ONE OF MY MENTORS ALWAYS USE TO SAY,”IF YOU CONTINUE TO DO WHAT YOU HAVE ALWAYS DONE,YOU WILL CONTINUE TO GET WHAT YOU HAVE ALWAYS GOTTEN”

ABSOLUTELY TRUE!! IS NOT IT?

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HOW TO COMBINE CREATIVITY AND RESULTS!!

As a rule, critical thinking is the norm in academia, and asking questions is necessary. Questioning ideas is the first step, and second is questioning the question itself.

As a result, academia has a reputation for being too open- ended and sluggish. In industry, we prefer to set a deadline, get things done and most importantly focus on execution. We worry that thinking about an idea could hold up progress.

Combine the two approaches to be sure you are both thinking creatively and getting results as well. Ask lots of questions but don’t let the questions impede  movement.

The questions should drive you toward a clear, defensible outcome!!

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