REWARDING PEOPLE IN ADVANCE CAN INDEED MAKE A BIG DIFFERENCE!!

Do you think rewarding people in advance makes more sense?

You would agree with me that sometimes even an  ordinary event can be an extraordinary event life- lessons for all of us.Like it happened at a lunch I had with with a friend a few years ago. As for as I can recall it,the food was good, and the conversation unforgettable. But what made the lunch memorable was really terrific and unusual.

As we entered the restaurant and sat down at our table, my friend reached for his wallet. He pulled out a 100-rupee note and handed it to the waiter, who accepted it with a big smile. Trust me, the size of the tip did not surprise me at all- it was the timing.

It was for the first time I had seen someone tipping for services even before we had ordered our meal. We got treated like royalty that afternoon. The service was quick, the waiter seemed to be hovering around us and there was a big smile all the time at his face. As we walked out after a great meal, I kept wondering: Why don’t we all tip before a meal? -rather than after a meal.

If we think about it, the lesson goes beyond tipping. Rewarding other people- in advance can bring magical result. So what really happened at the restaurant that day? By paying the tip upfront, my friend was telling the waiter, ‘I know you will do a terrific job of looking after us!’ And the waiter was probably telling himself, ‘Ah! He trusts me to look after him well. I must do all I can to live up to his expectations’. We expected great service that afternoon- and got it!

Unfortunately, most of us are brought up on a diet of conditional love and recognition. ‘ if you come first in class, then you will get a wrist watch’. Since only one kid can come first, that leaves  rest of us feeling inferior and unsure about ourselves. And yes,now imagine what might have happened if your father had given you a watch at the start of  your school term,said he knew you were a bright kid, and that he expected you to do well.

Your father expressing this confidence in you can create miracle. You would do all you could to live up to his expectations. Would that ensure you come first in  class? No, not quite.But would it make you do your best and perform to your full potential? You bet! It is for sure!

AND THAT IS REALLY WHAT LIFE IS ALL ABOUT AND YOUR INOVATIVE INSTINCTS PAYS OFF.

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REWARD PEOPLE IN ADVANCE AND SEE THE MAGIC.

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A SMALL SERVICE TO MY BELOVED READERS:

As i am also a life coach, if you so desire, you can refer to me  your personal, professional and family issues either through my blog or my email (given below) and I would send you my advice within a week.I am extending my services  to you for a very nominal  fee of 1 $ per advice which I only want to charge because when you get something free, you do not value it.My main objective

is to give you the benefit of my knowledge and three decades experience  so that you begin to think and understand life issues in an appropriate and rational manner and right perspective and lead a calm,anxiety free and happy life.

My email: ravi_singh52@hotmail.com

Thanks and Regards.

 

 

OUR CLOSEST ONE GIVE US HEARTACHES & PAINS BUT THEY ARE THE ONES WHO GIVE US WARMTH AS WELL WHEN WE NEED IT MOST !!

HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL MY BELOVED READERS!!

Do you know?

Porcupines are fascinating creatures.It is hard to believe, but each porcupine has an average about 30,000 quills. These are really like a hair but are coated with a keratin-like substance. When attacked the porcupine responds by dashing backwards into the enemy, and several of these quills get stuck in the attacker’s body causing serious injury.When one quill falls off from the porcupine’s body, another quickly takes its place.

I often think there are people who take after the animal! Docile at the first appearance……but when provoked,boy, all those quills are quickly out to fix you! I want to share with you an interesting story from the world of porcupines that holds a valuable-and pointed- life lessons for all of us.

The story is like it was a seriously harrowing time in porcupine’s land.The winter was severe and  the porcupines were finding survival most difficult.They were freezing to death. That is when they held  a meeting  to discuss on a course of action. As they got together to discuss their survival strategy, they discovered that just by being in close  proximity with each other they were able to feel warmer and protect each other. Being closeted together meant that their bodies generated heat which  helped keep everybody warm. So they found they could survive the cold by just staying together.

But there was a problem.As they moved closer,they found each other’s quills to be a problem-they pocked and hurt. Feeling this discomfort,some porcupines decided to avoid the pain from the quill pokes and moved away. As they ventured out on their own, the cold got them into its grip and they died.

Soon better sense prevailed and porcupines realized it was better to stay together and survive rather than go out on their own and die. Getting poked by the quills of porcupines that were close to them seemed like a small price to pay for the survival.

You will probably find that the porcupine story rings true in the context of  our families and orgnizations. We often get hurt by the words and actions of people close to us. We move away in anger, not realizing that being away- and alone- could mean paying a bigger price. You can notice how families,siblings fight and homes break up because of small differences- the odd porcupine prick. Business partnerships and joint ventures fell apart, and employees decides to part ways- because of minor differences with their partners and colleageus. We all seem to think that  going away would put an end to our trouble. No more quill priks is what we tell ourselves. But we seldom realize that going away often marks the beginning of new trouble, bigger challenges.

It is probably significant that the porcupines are hurt by the quills only of those porcupines that are closest to them.The porcupine that is far away does not cause pain,nor does it provide any warmth.It is good to remember that in life,the little heartaches and the discomfort and pain may be CAUSED BY THE ONES CLOSEST TO US- BUT THEY ARE THE ONES WHO GIVE US WARMTH WHEN WE NEED IT MOST.

YES! THIS IS REALITY OF LIFE!!

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A SMALL SERVICE TO MY BELOVED READERS:

As i am also a life coach, if you so desire, you can refer to me  your personal, professional and family issues either through my blog or my email (given below) and I would send you my advice within a week.I am extending my services  to you for a very nominal  fee of 1 $ per advice which I only want to charge because when you get something free, you do not value it.My main objective is to give you the benefit of my knowledge and three decades experience  so that you begin to think and understand life issues in an appropriate and rational manner and right perspective and lead a calm,anxiety free and happy life.

My email: ravi_singh52@hotmail.com

Thanks and Regards.

 

 

DO WE ALL REALLY NEED STICK IN THE NEW YEAR 2018 TO PUT US INTO ACTION!!

In my view,yes! We all need stick in all areas of our life to put us into action, in the new year 2018.

I have a interesting story about an elephant who would be taken out for a stroll through the lanes of the busy market.As it walked along,it would reach out with its trunk for a bunch of banana hanging out in front of a store,and before the shopkeeper could react,the banana would be inside the mouth of elephant. It would then sway its trunk into another store and bring down  bunches of carefully arranged flowers.Or it would grab a coconut from the woman selling coconut on the road and crunch it in its mouth like a walnut. The mahout(elephant’s master) would try to stop the elephant from doing all these things,but to no avail.The mahout even tried beating the elephant with his stick, but it would not listen. The banana and the coconut were just too  tempting to resist

But then one day, the clever mahout had an idea.As the elephant was leaving the temple gates for its evening walk,the mahout held his stick out for the elephant to hold with its trunk. The elephant obediently took the mohout’s stick and curled its trunk around it.

Now, as it walked through the busy market,the elephant longingly eyed the bananas but since it held stick with its trunk, it had  to leave the fruits alone.To grab the banana, it would have to drop the stick- and that would mean offending the mahout.So the elephant held on to the stick that the mahout  had given it and walked through the street without disturbing the merchandise in the shops. The shopkeeper were delighted,their admiration for  the temple elephant grew, and they often handed over gifts for the elephant to the mahout.

If you really think about it, we are all in a way like the elephant.As we go through our lives, we get distracted by the temptations around  us. And even though our mahouts-our parents, our teachers and our bosses- tell us to stay focused and not get distracted, we continue to do so. What we really need is that STICK to hold.That stick is usually a goal-a purpose- that excites us and keep us on track. Like an elephant’s trunk, our minds  too wanders. We need that stick to keep it focused.

Most of our problems in life start when we don’t have anything meaningful to do. Having no goals means not having to work towards achieving them. You need stick- in all areas of your life, not just at work.Not having a hobby or a passion means spending long hours doing nothing.That old adage still rings true- an idle mind is indeed a devil’s workshop.

So starting today, get yourself a goal, a purpose that drives you to action. That’s not all. Play a sport,indulge a passion, spend time on a hobby-don’t just sit there doing nothing. Unlike the temple elephant, not all of us are lucky enough to find a mahout- a caring leader-who gives us that stick to hold.But we all need that goal!

YOU WILL FIND A STICK FOR YOURSELF TODAY,WON’T YOU?

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                           Have a goal, purpose in life that will drive you to Action.

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A SMALL SERVICE TO MY BELOVED READERS:

As i am also a life coach, if you so desire, you can refer to me  your personal, professional and family issues either through my blog or my email (given below) and I would send you my advice within a week.I am extending my services  to you for a very nominal  fee of 1 $ per advice which I only want to charge because when you get something free, you do not value it.My main objective

is to give you the benefit of my knowledge and three decades experience  so that you begin to think and understand life issues in an appropriate and rational manner and right perspective and lead a calm,anxiety free and happy life.

My email: ravi_singh52@hotmail.com

Thanks and Regards.

HOW TO HAVE A MIND OF YOUR OWN AND THE CONVICTION TO BACK IT!!

We all have our own stories to tell about weird questions at job interview.But have you heard about how Thomas Alva Edison interviewed people who wanted to work with him? That’s an interesting story there!

After the initial round of questions,if Edison came across a  bright candidate,he would take him out to dinner before making up his mind on whether to hire him.The interview would continue over dinner,and when the food arrived,Edison would take a bite and remark, ‘I think this needs more salt!’. And then he would watch the candidate.

If the candidate added salt before tasting the food he would not be hired. However, if the candidate tasted the food and then decided if salt needed to be added ,Edison would hire him. Edison knew that people who easily believed what other people had to say,or made assumptions without first- hand knowledge or experience, would not be able to look afresh at problems and find innovative solution.They would have closed mind. Edison was looking for people with a mind of their own and the conviction to back it.

We all know people whose potential and dreams remained unrealized because they did not have the conviction to back their instincts.They chose a line of study or a career simply because someone else said it was best for them. They did not chase their passion just because someone said it was doomed, it would not work. In many cases,they gave up even without trying, assuming they could not do it-simply because someone else had said it could not be done.We all have had great ideas but not all of us have gone on to work on them and make them come to life.They later discover that someone else did exactly what we had in mind and found great success.

Do you own things? Make mistakes. Live on  the edge. Chase your dreams. Don’t just go by just what other people tell you. That may be a safe option but it is unlikely to get you the success you deserve.

GO FOR IT. AND YES, DON’T BLINDLY ADD THE SALT IN YOUR FOOD!

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Have an independent and innovative thinking and your own mind.

                                                  ______________________

A SMALL SERVICE TO MY BELOVED READERS:

As i am also a life coach, if you so desire, you can refer to me  your personal, professional and family issues either through my blog or my email (given below) and I would send you my advice within a week.I am extending my services to you for a very nominal  fee of 1 $ per advice which I only want to charge because when you get something free, you do not value it.My main objective is to give you the benefit of my knowledge and three decades experience  so that you begin to think and understand life issues in an appropriate and rational manner and right perspective and lead a calm,anxiety free and happy life.

My email: ravi_singh52@hotmail.com

Thanks and Regards.

DID YOU EVER HAVE THIS KIND OF EMBARRASSMENT IN A RESTAURANT?

Possibly No, but I don’t want to presume!

Can you believe that eating 10 Pastries in a restaurant could bring so much embarrassment to me? But you have got to trust me as this is a real life incidence!!

When I was very young, I was once going to to Pachmari, a hill station in Madhya Pradesh,India, to attend an Advanced Leadership Camp  with Rock Climbing Course. The duration of this camp was three  weeks.  After finishing the course,on my way back home,I decided to break my journey at Allhabad,UP,India and stay for a day with my brother,who was then studying Law at Allahabad University.

I reached my brother’s hostel in the morning and in the evening,he decided to take me for an outing along with his good friend.After roaming for about an hour, they took me to a very popular restaurant in Allhabad. They ordered for Coffee and  Pastry which was served to us after a while.

I was surprised to see that 12 Pastries of different varities were served to us in a plate. Strange-12 pastries for just three persons! While my brother and his friend were sipping coffee, they just took 1 piece of pastry each. I  picked up two pastry and finished it in no time. While I had finished 4 pastry, my brother and his friend had just one each and they did not seem to be  interested in eating anymore pastry. The ratio of pastry consumption between my brother/his friend and me seemed to me unbalanced and I was keen that they atleast pick up one more each so that I find it easy to lay my hands on balance pastry without any hesitation. But they seemed to be firm on not eating anymore.

Meanwhile,my brother’s friend called the waiter and asked him to bring the bill. What struck to me was that this restaurant would anyway charge us for the full plate containing 12 pastries.If we don’t eat the remaining 6 pastries, we wil have to pay for 12 pastries and waiter will take away unfinshed 6 pastries. So before the waiter could bring the bill, which took about 5 minutes,I grabbed one pastry each in my both hand  and finshed it all  remaining 6 pastries before the waiter could show his face. After the payment, we all came out of the restaurant and decided to return to hostel.

When we reached my brother’s hostel room around 9 pm, the food was being served in the hostel’s mess. My brother asked me to accompany him to mess for dinner, but since I had consumed 10 pastries I was feeling uneasy and refused to have my dinner. My brother looked at me with a long face and told me, ‘ don’t you have eating manners? Why did you eat 10 pastries in one go like an ANIMAL?’ I said to my brother, ‘I did not want  while we pay for 12 pastries, waiter takes away unconsumed 6 pastries.My brother told me you are all wrong-the restaurant’s serves assorted pastries of all varities in a plate and they charge only for the pastries consumed and take away unconsumed pastries withoud charging for them.  Meanwhile, my brother’s friend dropped in the room and was enquiring with my brother,if I was feeling ok now(since I had complained of stomach uneasiness).

I got so embarrassed at my ignorance, greed and this incidence,that I failed to keep my eye contact with my friend and his friend.

HA HA HA HA………….What a memorable but embarrassing day!!

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A SMALL SERVICE TO MY BELOVED READERS:

As i am also a life coach, if you so desire, you can refer to me  your personal, professional and family issues either through my blog or my email (given below) and I would send you my advice within a week.I am extending my services  to you for a very nominal  fee of 1 $ per advice which I only want to charge because when you get something free, you do not value it.My main objective

is to give you the benefit of my knowledge and three decades experience  so that you begin to think and understand life issues in an appropriate and rational manner and right perspective and lead a calm,anxiety free and happy life.

My email: ravi_singh52@hotmail.com

Thanks and Regards.

HOW TO HAVE STRONG BIAS FOR ACTION!! DO YOU HAVE IT?

LEADERS JUST DO IT!

MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL MY BELOVED READERS.

May I ask you a simple question  to help you put on action.There are three monkeys sitting on a tree branch stretching out over a small river.One of the monkeys decides to jump into the river. How many monkeys are left on the tree?

Did I hear you say, ‘Two’?

Wrong.The right answer is three. You would agree,the monkey only made the decision to jump into the river.He did not actually jump! What  is true for those monkeys is probably true for all of us too. We take decisions and make resolutions.But for some reasons,we don’t follow through with action.An intent without action is really quite useless.Getting started-taking that first step-is often the master key to success.

Great leaders have a strong bias for action. Do you find yourself struggling to take action on your plans and intentions?

Well,in order to help you move from intent to action,given below is a three-point programme.From good to great.

1-Whatever be your goal take the first step,however small. Until you take that first step,your mind does not believe you.  You need to signal yourself that you mean business. Commit to taking action,immediately. Today. Now.

2-As the Johnnie walker advertisement keeps reminding us a journey of a thousand mile begins with a single step. Sometimes the task ahead looks so enormous that we feel overwhelmed and don’t do anything about it. So break that up into smaller sub-tasks, and suddenly, you will find something that is practical and doable.

3-Visualize your success.As I always say,if you can see it in your mind,you can hold it in your hand. Think of the pleasure, not the pain. If you want to acquire an MBA degree at a premier school and plan to devote three hours a day to studying, don’t think about missing the cricket game on television or not being able to go out for that Saturday night bash. Think instead of the job that you could get after your MBA, the reward that it would bring, the dream that would get realized.

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1- Every morning,write down a list of things that need to be done that day.

2-Just do them.

                   IS THIS NOT SIMPLE?

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A SMALL SERVICE TO MY BELOVED READERS:

As i am also a life coach, if you so desire, you can refer to me  your personal, professional and family issues either through my blog or my email (given below) and I would send you my advice within a week.I am extending my services  to you for a very nominal  fee of 1 $ per advice which I only want to charge because when you get something free, you do not value it.My main objective

is to give you the benefit of my knowledge and three decades experience  so that you begin to think and understand life issues in an appropriate and rational manner and right perspective and lead a calm,anxiety free and happy life.

My email: ravi_singh52@hotmail.com

Thanks and Regards.

 

 

 

DAILY PROMPT: TORN

There may be various interpretation of ‘TORN’ but to me Torn means a weak person.

  • Most of the problems in our life are because we do not have control of every word that we are yet to utter,but are a slave to every word we have already uttered.This is a clear trait of a torn person
  • If your words have no value and during your conversation with others you only say the right  things  at the right time but don’t leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting time-you may be a weak person.
  • If you wipe out the decade of good work in an instant by your impulsive ANGER-you may be a torn person.

 

MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL MY BELOVED READERS