One of the best piece of advice I have ever got was from my dad-who was my mentor,guide,philosopher and a critic.He made me a person what I am today.This master piece advice from my dad has stayed in my mind ever since.He told me to always remember THREE WORDS:’Pause and Decide!’ These three words were for me not just an articulation of father’s philosophy,but also a pitchy masterclass or sound advice in effective decision-making. Everytime I need to respond to something or take a decision,my dad’s words flash into my mind-pause and decide.
Driven by impulsive responses,we often take decisions in haste.Someone says something to us-and we immediately react with words and actions that come back to haunt us later.Alas! if only we would make it a habit to heed my late dad’s advice.
The next time you are very angry or badly hurt, or need to make a decision,take a deep breadth-before saying a word or moving a finger.The next time something goes wrong and you feel like reacting immediately-JUST HOLD IT!! After the moment has passed,you will find the turmoil or dust settling down.The mind gets clearer.And the decision that follows is usually by far better than what you might have taken in haste.
Our decisions are very often, more like a negative one than a positive choice.We change jobs not because of one negative appraisal feedback session,boss’s outburst of anger or a promotion that we lost out on.We make career choices,break relationship- all in the heat of moment.In an era of increasing download speeds, we seem to be in a hurry to take a decisions. As a matter of fact,in most cases, a cool headed approach would have made for far better,more rational decisions.There is a thin line which seperates haste from speed-but it is a critical decision.It has been well said-‘Decide in haste,repent at leisure’. But unfortunately, we still have not learned our lessons.
I would like to share the story of a spiritual master who went on a pilgrimage with his disciples.The wise old man felt thirsty and wanted some water.A disciple quickly walked over to a nearby stream,jar in hand,to fetch some water.The stream was crystal clear as he could see the sun’s rays on the water.Just as he was about to fill the jar,a bullock cart crossed the stream.As the wheel churned the soil of the bed of the stream,the water turned muddy.It did not look clean enough to drink,so the disciple went back to the master empty-handed, and explained what had happened.The master asked him to wait for a while to allow the mud to settle.When the disciple went back a little while later,he was delighted to find the water was cryatal clear again.
As the master took a sip of the water,he said:’our minds are like that stream.An external event or stimulus-like that bullock cart can cause our mind to get muddled up.When that happens,all you need to to do is relax.Just wait a while and allow the DUST to settle.And your mind will be clear again.
So the next time you feel stressed or agitated and want to respond,just think of the bullock cart and the stream.Remember my dad’s advice:
PAUSE AND DECIDE.
A SMALL SERVICE TO MY BELOVED READERS:
As i am also a life coach, if you so desire, you can refer to me your personal, professional and family issues either through my blog or my email (given below) and I would send you my advice within a week.I am extending my services to you for a very nominal fee of 1 $ per advice which I only want to charge because when you get something free, you do not value it.My main objective
is to give you the benefit of my knowledge and three decades experience so that you begin to think and understand life issues in an appropriate and rational manner and right perspective and lead a calm,anxiety free and happy life.
My email: firstname.lastname@example.org
Thanks and Regards.